Long time no post

630 in the morning and the call goes out for a working code.

Shaking off the power nap I had just taken I jump into the jump seat as my preceptor signs us onto the radio. The call is for a 6 week old who is pulseless and aepnic. CPR in progress.

After what seems like a slow drive at 95mph we arrive at the house and find volunteer firefighters in their pajamas out front. "We are bringing him out now" they tell us so I get what I can set up in the back.

He is a little thing. So tiny, limp and blue it almost doesn't seem real. He barely reaches the gray area of the Broslow tape. We cut away his onesey and put the pads on him while ventilating him and doing CPR. A flat line burns its way across the screen telling us what we had already suspected. We don't even have a name as we close the doors and speed off to the hospital. Luckily there are three of us in the back. I am kneeling on the stretcher doing CPR and ventilating the best I can while my partners grab the IO drill and the intubation kit.

The first IO goes in and it does not look stable and we confirm the miss as we see the site infiltrate. I remove the mask and my preceptor is attempting to intubate but he sees nothing so we resume ventilations. The ambulance rocks back and forth down the road to the hospital as we place another IO needle in her right leg and draw up Epinephrine. One more try for the intubation while the Epinephrine goes in and we pull up to the hospital. Still nothing on the monitor except artifact and CPR. We move her over to the hospital stretcher and give report to the doctor as he tries to intubate. The hospital staff takes over care and I step back exhausted. My stomach is burning and my throat is tight.

The doctors calls time of death at 659. I walk out to my ambulance as the doctor goes in to tell the family who is still in their pajamas and I hear the sound of her mother screaming and crying as I clean up and restock. I am thankful my shift is over.